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Snape kills Dumbledore!
Ultimate Custom Night Audio Transcripts
Admit it, you wanted to let me in.
Why do you hide inside these walls?
Don’t be shy.
These are strange circumstances, that have brought us together.
Now I will tell you a story..
But he could not choose..
He pieced the remains together…
I guess you forgot about me…
Want to see the scooping room?
I guess you forgot about me…
Uh oh! How unfortunate!
I’m gonna do a sneaky thing,
and throw a new contender in the ring!
Uh oh! How unfortunate!
Uh oh! How unfortunate!
I know how much you like to fight,
so I’ll add a new problem to your night!
Argh! You never stoood a chance!
Argh! I came for ye booty! That…be treasure, you know.
I can’t run like I used to, but I can pull myself apart just fine!
Argh, so much more spacious in here! I might stay a while.
I’m ready for my close-up!
Don’t get distracted!
Smile!
Say cheese!
Showtimes are on the hour – not a moment before and not a moment later!
It’s time to take your final bow!
I’m sorry but there was never enough room on this stage for both of us!
A performance was demanded of me, and now I have delivered! Encore!
You and I don’t get to talk as often as I like
Everyone underestimates me, but then they turn their back and I’m like “BOO!”, and they’re like “Waaaagggh”.
Move over Freddy Fazbear! Happy Frog is the new star of the show!
(Overlapping child’s voice)We’ve only just begun. I will never let you leave. I will never let you rest.
Come and burn with me.
The fire within me burns eternal, and now you shall as well!
I am a burning reminder of your misdeeds.
Greetings from the fire, and from the one you should not have killed.
Shhhhh. There is room for one more.
Shhhhh. Come spend eternity, inside, with me.
Shhhhh. I’ve been looking for you, and now I will never let you go.
Shhhhh. I’m so glad that I found you. Let me make room for you.
Now I get to play take-apart and put-back-together! You won’t feel a thing.
I wanted to wait until just the right moment to drop in!
It’s so much more fun hanging out in here with you.
He’s here, and always watching. The one you shouldn’t have killed.
It reminds me of one supper day in the park, I was having just a delightful…picnic with my good friend Orville. And I said to him, I said “Orville I…I have a story” and he said to me “What’s the significance of the story?” and…I said to him, “O..Orville, not every story has to have significance, you know? Sometimes uh…y’know sometimes a story’s just a story. you try to read into every little thing and find meaning in everything anyone says, you’ll just drive yourself crazy – had a friend do it once, wasn’t pretty, we talked about it for years and not only that but, you’ll likely end up believing something you shouldn’t believe and thinking something you shouldn’t think o-o-or assuming something you shouldn’t assume, you know? Sometimes” I said, “a story is…is just a story. So just be quiet for one second of your life and eat your sandwich ok?”
Of course, it was only then I realised I made sandwiches and, poor Orville was…having such difficulty eating it! Elephants have those clumsy hands, you know? Actually, I-I suppose that’s the problem. They don’t have hands at all, do they? They’re…they’re all feet! I-I couldn’t imagine someone asking me to eat a sandwich with my feet!
Now if I recall correctly there was a bakery nearby. I-I said to him “Orville, let me go get you some rye bread”. Now, I-I’m unsure if elephants enjoy rye bread but, I assure you that Orville does. Now this was on a Tuesday which was good because rye bread was always fresh on Tuesday. They made sour-dough bread on Monday and threw it out Wednesday, or rather they…sold it at a discount for people wantin’ to feed the ducks and then, probably at the end of the day finally they threw it all out. I-I don’t recall.
I do remember a man who would bring his son to the bakery every Wednesday and then go feed the ducks. He would buy all of the sour-dough bread – of course, you know, you’re not supposed to feed the ducks sour-dough bread at all! It swells up in their stomach and then they all die. It uh…least…at least that’s what I’ve heard. You know, I-I never saw any ducks die myself but I did notice a substantial decrease in the duck population over the course of a few years. I just never thought to stop the man and tell him that he was killing the ducks by feeding them sour-dough bread! And if you want my opinion on the matter? Heh – and I told Orville this as well – If you wanna feed ducks or birds of any kind for that matter, it’s best to buy seed. I mean, when you think about it, breads of any sort don’t occur in nature. They don’t grow on trees or spring up from the bushes. I don’t think birds know what to do with bread.
What was I saying? Oh, oh yes yes. So I bought Orville some rye bread. What a fine day it was.
It seems that you have met your end. What a pity. Y’know I…I don’t feel too bad about it though. After all if it weren’t me, it would’ve just been one of the others I guess. I’m honestly just glad to be out of those air ducts. Y’know, it’s…it’s not easy for a hippopotamus to fit up there. And…not…easy to get down either. Not as young as I used to be as you can see. I used to be able to do all sorts of things – y-you’re young, you’re vibrant, you have that sort of pep in your step. It reminds me of a conversation I was having with one of my good friends, Orville.
We were having a nice picnic one day. I believe it was summer, or perhaps it was…was it the fall? Yes, yes, yes, it was the fall because the leaves had turned already. But I said to Orville, I-I says “Orville, I have a story to tell you”, y’know Orville looked at me…y’know, kinda odd and, and said “What is it about?”. I said to him, “Not every story has to be about something, Orville. Sometimes a person just wants to talk, why does everything have to be a story?” I said to him. He just looked at me and he said “Well, y-y-you said you had a story” and, y’know he was quite right, I did in fact. I told him I had a story. I suppose if a person just wants to talk then, it’s best to not announce that you’re telling a story. Telling a story does come with its own pressures and expectations I…I suppose. After all, if you’re just talking to a friend then, there’s no more expectations than if you were talking into the wind!
Words by themselves aren’t expected to carry and, aren’t expected to stick. But if, y’know, if you announce you’re telling a story well then…there better be a point to it all, y’know? No one wants to sit and listen to someone ramble oooon and oooon and on with absolutely no end in sight. So, you know it’s-it’s good to be mindful that when you tell someone that you’re about to tell a story, that you have something to say. Telling someone that you’re gonna tell them a story is tantamount to asking them to stop what they’re doing, and-and pay attention.
You’re basically saying “Hey, hey, hey buddy stop everything, stop what you’re thinking – I have a solution to everything”, and well, I didn’t really have any story to tell. In-in hindsight I-I probably just misspoke when I said that I had a story. I think it would have just been better to tell Orville that I wanted to tell him something rather than tell him that I had a story, but y’know, even then it might have put too much importance on the whole thing. Either way it was quite a nice day. I remember, I remember that we were drinking tea.
Well, it seems that your journey, has ended. Very sorry about that, it was-it always was gonna to end this way of course. If it weren’t by me it…would’ve just been by some other y’know, terrible thing just, you could not imagine how terrible it would be! Just, I get scared thinking about it. Glad it’s not me.
It reminds me of a, of a time I was speaking to my good friend Orville. We were…we were sitting on a park bench watching the pigeons. I was on the left, he was on the..oh wait, was I on the right? Or left? Anyways it doesn’t matter, we were sitting on there watching the pigeons. And uh, I-I said to Orville, “friend, those birds are frozen!”, a-and he kinda looked at me like I’d lost my mind, but I reminded him that it was winter y’know and, often birds will sit in a tree until they freeze, then they, they you know sorta fall to the ground, until the sun warms them up, a-and they can y’know, move around again. So I said to Orville “you might as well save those breadcrumbs until the birds thaw, because they can’t very well enjoy them in the condition they’re in”. To which he asked what I meant and, asking what condition the crumbs should be in before he threw them to the birds, assuming that I meant the birds couldn’t enjoy, the breadcrumbs in the condition that the crumbs were in, when in-fact, I had meant the birds could not enjoy them in the condition that the birds were in, considering that the birds were frozen, you know? So, he took a moment and then threw his last handful onto the ground. I said to him “Orville, why did you throw the breadcrumbs to the birds when I just told ya’ they’re frozen?”. To which he responded “the breadcrumbs are not frozen” – again, misunderstanding my words. I didn’t mean to say that the breadcrumbs were frozen, when I said I told ya they’re frozen, I’d been referring to the birds.
You know, in hindsight what I-what I should’ve said was – and this would make perfect sense – “Why did you throw the breadcrumbs to the birds when the birds are frozen”? He misunderstood upon my correction stating that he didn’t know what else to do with the breadcrumbs and, that perhaps you know, when the birds thawed they’d still be able to eat the crumbs. So I…I-I said to Orville, I said – and this is what I said to him – I said “Orville, the birds may be dead”.
It seems that you have met a..a horrible demise my friend. But uh, you know, these…these things happen and…and life…life goes on. N..not for you obviously, uh, you’re dead, but uh, it reminds me of a time, I was-I was having a conversation with my friend Orville.
We were uh…where were we? I think we were by the…..with um, the river. We were sitting by the river and watching the fish leap over the falls, and uh…I said to Orville “You know sometimes, I feel like a fish leaping over and over again, always trying to get somewhere, though I don’t know where, only to find myself in the jaws of a beast”. He…course looked at me surprised, you know? “Have you been in the jaws of a beast, friend?”. To which I said, “No, of course not Orville”. I said, “No no no no, I…I simply meant that, life can seem like a relentless endeavour to overcome, meaningless obstacles, only to meet an equally meaningless fate regardless of your efforts – regardless of, the obstacles you’ve passed”.
And uh, Orville he…he, he stood and proceeded to drape me, with the picnic cloth, to which I…I..I..I asked him, I said “Friend, what…what are ya doing?”. He looked at me very concerned really. “I feel like you’ve gotten too much sun”. Indeed heh, indeed I had. He proceeded to pour me a glass of just…ice cold lemonade. Oooh, you ever mix it with iced tea? You do like…oh, half lemonade ha- ooh, it’s so- you should try it some- well you can’t because you’re dead but, anyways.
So, you may be asking yourself, “How did I go from sitting by the falls and drinking lemonade to being wedged in the air duct. Not only with Orville but with an entire assortment of fruity-colored friends?”. Well, there’s uh…there’s really no good answer to that but…perhaps I met a demise of my own at some point and…this is my afterlife or my dream. Whatever it might mean, I…I honestly don’t know. Or, maybe it doesn’t mean anything at all. Maybe it doesn’t mean anything at all…
You hear that? It’s the sweet sweet sound of your eternal silence!
Hey! Keep it down, would ya?
When I’m here, you play by MY rules!
A song was requested of me, and now I sing it!
Stranger danger!
-chuckles- I was just waiting for you to drop your guard
Whoops! That’s gonna leave a mark.
(Overlapping child’s voice)This is how it feels, and you get to experience it over, and over, and over again. Forever. I will never let you leave.
The shadow fears me.
I am your wickedness, made flesh.
I am here to claim, what is left of you.
I will vomit you back, to relive your horror.
-chuckles- You’e not so big! Just a bite-sized morsel. -bite-
You knew I’d get you eventually.
There just isn’t room in here for both of us. -chuckles-
Flash that light all you want! It can’t save you now!
Let’s see how many times you can be pulled apart.
I assure you, I am very real.
This time, there is more than an illusion to fear.
We know who our friends are, and you are not one of them.
No light can save you now.
I have always been hiding in your shadow.
What a gift to relish. a victim that can’t perish.
I am given flesh to be your tormentor.
This t-time, death cannot save yo-ou.
The n-nightmare is j-just beginning.
Let’s ta-aste de-eath, again, and again, and again.
I am the fearful reflect-ection of what you have cre-eated.
I don’t get out much, so you’ll have to forgive my enthusiasm!
I hope you enjoyed the grand finale!
Now is my time to shine!
(Overlapping child’s voice)He tried to release you. He tried to release us. But I’m not gonna let that happen. I will hold you here. I will keep you here. No matter how many times, they burn us.
If you sit by the river long enough, you will see the body of your enemy float by. -chuckles- -banjo tune-
Even monkeys fall from trees. -banjo tune-
The nail that sticks out, gets hammered down. -banjo tune-
The talented hawk hides his claws. -banjo tune-
So good to see you again, my truest friend! But now, you life, must end!
What a fine day, to come here to say that your face and flesh I must flay!
What a treat, to come here and meet, your face as it hits concrete!
I found my guitar, now reach for the stars as I blunt it, through your heart!
That’ll teach ya for trying to trick this old bird!
Thought you could fool me with that sign, but I was too smart for ya!
I may not like wet floors but the smell of fresh meat is just too enticing! haha!
Whoops, looks like you’re the one that slipped up this time!
Yargh, how may I be of service to ya?
Yargh who touched me bird?
Yargh, me bird likes you, so I’ll do ye a favour.
Yargh, you win some, you lose some.
Yargh, ye play with fire and sometimes ye get burned.
Please deposit five coins!
Please deposit five coins!
YoU are attempting to trick FREDdy
You are attempting to-glitches out-
Freddy doesn’t lIKE this.
Thank you, for depositing five coins.
Time for your controlled shock.
Let’s see how many pieces I can cut you into.
You won’t die, but you’ll wish you could.
I don’t hate you, but you need to stay out of my way.
I recognise you! But I’m not afraid of you. Not anymore.
The others are under my protection.
The others are like animals, but I am very aware.
Where’s my beak? Lodged in your forehead of course.
You won’t get tired of my voice…will you?
Let’s go somewhere more private. So I can eat you.
-laughs-
That’s what you get for leaving me hanging!
It’s not my fault! I have these fat plastic fingers and can’t press the buttons!
Mr. Hugs got me again!
If I get jumpscared, YOU get jumpscared!
Hey, hey, I want to tell you something.
Pssst, hey, over here. Get closer.
Excuse me, can you come a little closer?
Hey, down here. Hello? I wanted to ask you something. It’s something really important.
Might as well face the fact, you were always destined to fail.
You blinked.
What is this new prison? Is it me trapped, or is it you? Perhaps it’s us both.
I may be missing my face, but even I could see this coming.
Let me show you how to break your face, and look like me!
I was the first, I have seen everything.
Come closer, let’s smile together!
I have seen him, the one you shouldn’t have killed!
Uh oh! How unfortunate!
I’m gonna do a sneaky thing,
and throw a new contender in the ring!
I’ll try to get the subtitles, japanese translation and – if possible – actual japanese here. NO PROMISES.)
I’ll try to get the subtitles, japanese translation and – if possible – actual japanese here. NO PROMISES.)
I’ll try to get the subtitles, japanese translation and – if possible – actual japanese here. NO PROMISES.)
Yesterday was so amazing and I met such a wonderful guy! But, I don’t think it was meant to last. For my heart belongs to another!
He’s so amazing and strong and so, so cute! I’ve been thinking about him all day, and I think he’s really into me too!
He’s the only one for me, I just know it. And, I know just how to get him.
Look at that top hat! That amazing top hat! He’ll be mine by the end of the day, I just know it!
I told him that I needed help with my homework. But, once he’s there, I’ll have him! And once I have him, he’ll be mine forever!
Look at that untamed fur! That amazing silky sheen! He’ll be mine by the end of the day, I just know it!
I told him that someone ran over his dog in front of my house! But once he’s there, I’ll entice him with warm cookies, lure him inside – I mean invite him inside, and then I’ll have him! And once I have him, he’ll be mine forever!
Look at those ears! Those amazing ears! He’ll be mine by the end of the day, I just know it!
I told him that my house was on fire. But once he’s there, I’ll tell him that I threw myself on the flames to put them out! He’ll be so impressed that he’ll fall for me immediately. And once I have him, he’ll be mine forever!
Look at those eyes. Those amazing eyes. He’ll be mine by the end of the day, I just know it!
I told him that I’d taken several live hostages at my house. But once here’s there, I’ll tell him that I let them go because I love him! He’ll fall for me immediately. And once I have him, he’ll be mine forever!
Look at those strings! Those long, beautiful strings. He’ll be mine by the end of the day, I just know it!
I told them to come over later. That should be enough. And, if he doesn’t show up, I’ll just go to his house! And if he doesn’t open the door, I’ll just find a window. Chimney’s always an option. Or, I could set the house on fire and wait for him to run out! Then he could run into MY arms!
Look at that…snout? Uh, emm, looks aren’t everything! He’ll be mine by the end of the day, I just know it!
I’ll just wait for him after school, throw a bag over his head, hit him with a shovel and drag him into the back of my car! Then when he wakes up, I’ll tell him that someone was trying to kidnap and kill him – I don’t know, Balloon Boy maybe – and then I’ll tell him that I rescued him! He’ll fall for me immediately!
There is only one thing that could possibly go wrong…
Dear diary,
Things didn’t work out as I’d hoped and once again I’m left with nothing but a broken heart. But tomorrow is another day, and I just know that there’s a guy out there that’s right for me.
